Let's Snap Out Of It!

A few days ago, I was out on a lesson spree with Elango (http://elangothiyagu.com / http://et-ideas.com) together with Valsala (http://observersdeck.blogspot.my / http://globetrotterconsultancy.com.my), and as we all know, the whole world is a teaching ground for him. 

I didn't feel so good that day and I didn't feel like myself too. I kept quiet, not realizing I was falling into the 'drama' trap of wanting someone to ask me if I was okay in order to continue being in the not-okay mood. 

There were points of time when I did realize I was creating a drama through my tone of voice, my gestures and facial expression. But it felt like I couldn't take control of myself and stop the drama. Instead, my mind told me 'It is okay to go on with the drama' and foolishly, I followed my mind.

I'm sure lots of you have gone through this 'drama' that I'm talking about. The weirdest things that we do using our body language, tone of voice, gestures and etc; with or without realizing that we are causing the drama but insist on staying in it, just to get some attention.

For example, when you are angry at someone, instead of telling the truth to the person, you give short answers to their questions, sometimes not even answering the question, slamming the door, raising your voice and other 'funny' gestures. All these because you want the other person to know you are angry with them and you need their attention to solve it. 

But these are what Elango call 'dramas' because something simple like saying "I am angry with you because... ", becomes a riddle to be guessed by the other party. (Check out AscendancePro.com to understand more of Elango's explanations.)

So, coming back to my story of not being okay, since I did realize that I was not being myself, I thought it is a good realization that could lead me into telling the truth. But then, my mind interrupted by saying I would spoil the conversations and the mood's of the rest of them if I told the truth.

Here's where I got it wrong! My mind doesn't want me to tell the truth so that it can grow in the dark and keep on building the feeling that, since nobody asked me if I was okay, it means nobody cared about me. Remember wanting attention? It all relates to that.

But as time passed by and as I saw what I was missing out on - the good conversations and mostly, the lessons, I decided to tell Elango that I was not okay.

I expected replies like, "Why are you not okay? What happened?" or etc, but instead he told me, "You can choose to switch if you want. Or you can remain in your not-okay mood". 

First I was blur. Then the realization hit me. DRAMAS! I'm creating dramas! And if he said I can switch to my original self and come out of the 'drama', then I can do so. 

It is weird how you actually have this magical ability to switch if you really really wanted to and if you take the effort to, that my mind shrugged and gave up on continuing the petty 'drama' which I don't even remember what caused it.

But as much as I decided to switch, I got a lot of help from my senses this time. 

It's a little bit contradicting from what Elango quoted from someone saying, "The senses are the five devils".

But here's why my senses helped me at that point of time. Because my sense of sight was watching Elango's respond to my 'drama' which is basically nothing apart from being himself, laughing and having fun. This in turn got my subconscious very confused because I was not getting the reaction that I'm supposed to get to continue with the 'drama'. When I told the truth and Elango gave me options to switch or remain in the drama, it confused me even more as that is not the typical reply that most people would have given.

His reply reduced my emotions as my intellect now had something to think about and when I got out of it, my spirit was happy because it can get back to the awesome conversations once again.

Well, as much as our senses has been trained wrongly which causes most of the problems that happens in our lives, but by being surrounded by people who respond instead of react (like what Elango did), gets absorbed into our subconscious mind. This in a long run, being in an environment which consist of people who respond, refines our subconscious programming to respond too!

That's not my explanation but my understanding of Elango's teaching after I snapped out of my 'drama'. Which also comes to the point that, if you are creating 'dramas' or are in the state of negative emotions, it is most of the time, difficult to learn the lesson as you are busy entertaining your ridiculous 'dramas'. 

Obstacles Isn't The Full-stop To Success

I had a video shoot last night for a project that I am currently working on when I remembered an incident that occurred few years back. Just to note here, I work behind the scenes when it comes to 'video shoots', where I work to materialize the crazy ideas which I have in my head.

Last night's video shoot

Coming back to the incident that occurred few years ago, it was during my Diploma days where I was struggling with this particular subject which was about videography. I'm not too sure if I wasn't interested in the subject but it was more to not knowing how to go about certain things related to videography and I found it very hard to get things right.

I wasn't very good with the video editing software's as well that as much as I found it somewhat interesting, I kept grumbling about the assignments I was given to at that time. There was one assignment that made me change my perception about videography.

We were told to come out with a movie trailer and it must be accompanied with the appropriate sound effects and music.

I was already struggling with the video editing software and on top of that, I was given an assignment I had no idea how I was going to do. 

I tried doing the assignment, after procrastinating a long time and realizing the deadline was getting closer. Somehow, I manage to complete that assignment.

Then comes the time to present it to my lecturer. I expected to show it to my lecturer privately as then nobody would know if there's anything wrong with my trailer. But my lecturer requested us to show the trailer's while my classmates was around. 

It was my turn and I hit the play button and the trailer started playing. It wasn't exactly what you would call excellent as I did it last minute but I thought it was 'okay'. Unfortunately, my lecturer did not have the same perception as me.

He criticized me in front of my classmates for not doing a good job with the trailer. It might be the fact that I was really really embarrassed of the whole situation that I told myself I would never again do anything that has got to do with video.

Well, things often take a different turn every now and then. Just two years back, I was offered to host a program called, ET Youth, where my job not only encompasses talking in front of the camera, but also other behind-the-scenes like working on video editing software's, discussing with the team about camera angles, video shooting equipments and many other things. 

ET Youth on-screen and behind-the-scenes

Then last year, it progressed into making Corporate Videos for companies to promote and market about their products and services; which got me involved in voice-overs, scripting, getting the cast to stick to the scripts while still not losing their true personality, tons of retakes of scenes and monitoring all of these with my awesome team. 

To me, it was odd that the very thing that I told myself I would never do turns out to be the very thing that gets me excited and wanting to do it again. 

Working on Corporate Videos

But I also realized that just because I get hit with some obstacles (like struggling with the video editing software's) or just because someone criticized me or just because I felt like the whole world was looking down on me which made me very embarrassed, that doesn't mean I can never do it.

This is a small lesson learned from my little little experiences and a lot from my mentor correcting my mind into believing my own capabilities. 

I still remember when I told my mentor that I don't want to go for my very first project of a video shoot, he sent me a text with a picture as below:

As much as I was so annoyed with the message, 'just doing it' made a lot of difference after that day. ;)

Follow your Heart. And enjoy it!

Recently I went on a one-day trip to Genting for a concert. 

I was very excited when Elango invited me for it. Since I didn't know much about the concert, I Googled it!

Turns out, it is a concert about this guy called Kenny G who played the saxophone.

Skeptical because I've never been to an instrumental concert, I decided to listen to his music. His songs was indeed impressive and very calming.

Kenny G, signing autographs, half an hour before his concert.

Elango got us pretty good seats near the stage. And at 9pm, the concert began.

Kenny G played his saxophone walking from the crowd to the stage as they cheered and clapped for him. He sounded truly amazing!

He waved his hand to every section of the audience while he played his instrument on the other hand. He was just like a kid. Smiling while playing. And at times moving his body to his music.

He only spoke after a few songs saying he was very happy to be here with all of us - in the Malay language. I thought that was very sweet of him.

He continued playing more songs and though I didn't really know his songs, I'm pretty sure anyone would fall in love with it, even if you are just listening to it for the first time.

His band was very good entertainers too, taking turns to showcase their talent as well as complementing Kenny G's songs.

Two hours passed just like that. All eyes were consistently on him. Glued to him actually. I went out of the concert hall feeling mesmerized.

Elango was saying about how impressive Kenny G is for getting the full-packed hall immersed in his music without the help of any other performers. I actually thought it wouldn't be possible but it was.

Well, here's something Elango often told the group of us at ET Ideas (http://ET-Ideas.com). That as long as our heart wants to do something (example, a career), we will always be having fun and will enjoy doing it.

Kenny G is 59 years old. Didn't look anything like his age but so much more younger. Played his instrument like its the best toy he has ever received. Like a kid, waltzing with his music, enjoying it.

It was a pleasure to watch his performance. A vibe that felt like follow your heart. Do what you love and enjoy doing it.

After writing this blog post, I got to know that Elango also wrote his experiences from Kenny G's concert and he related it back to his experiences about 'Doing What You Love...' And I thought that would get all of you to understand better about following your heart and enjoying the flow of it!

Is Your Environment Good For You?

3 years is definitely a long time but that's how long it took me to realize this. Something my mentor often speaks about. "Find the right environment. Your environment is very important." I bet my mentor would be shaking his head to know I took so long to discover this.

Well, here's what happened. The most life changing experience for me is when I had a goal. A goal in life, something my heart wants to achieve. I presumed, most of you would understand what I mean by goals. If you don't, maybe its time you have a goal in your life.

I didn't know by just having a goal, lots of things could change in my life. Of course, taking actions towards it is as important as just having a goal and wishing upon it. But hey, everyone needs to start somewhere, right?

So, why do I agree with the statement that my mentor said about our environment?

I don't think I need to give the definition to what an environment is but to make sure all of us are in the same page here, environment is what I mean by your surrounding. And it is mostly about the people you are often surrounded with.

How do people affect you? Well, if you look back at your environment, you would notice that your thoughts, words and actions changes as you change your group of friends, your environment. The way you think, the words you say and the actions you do is most of the time a habit pattern that you have collected from the environment you are most used to. And that is why, environment says a lot about who you are as well.

So, how did I come to realize this?

Well, being introduced to many things like repetition of goals, following your heart and not the mind, SIEP, Nature's Laws and etc etc, it requires you to put things into practice.

And what's the best way to put things into practice? Of course, when everyone else surrounding you is practicing it as well.

I realized that when I get emotional, it is hard to stay that way for too long. If I don't feel like working on my goals, I end up doing something related to my goals someway.

The reason being is because of my environment. Firstly, my environment, ET Ideas, is mostly filled with people who have goals in their life. Secondly, regardless of whatever obstacles they face or whatever emotions they are in, they are always doing something to move closer towards their goals.

I'm not bragging about my environment here but all I'm saying is to take a look at your environment, your group of friends and truthfully, I repeat here, TRUTHFULLY ask yourself if you are happy with where you are.

If the answer is 'Yes', I'm as happy for you as you are. But if your answer is 'No', you already know what you need to do.

A change of environment is all you need.

Unconditional Love

What's love meant to be?

Can it be defined?

Well, it used to be between family and the ones that I like a lot.

That's until I was introduced to this two words - unconditional love.

Though what it meant was pretty obvious but I still asked the question, 'What the hell does that mean?'

I found the answer to that which is loving someone without any conditions. But it is still not easy to be practised.

Let me share an experience of mine. The word love is a habit pattern to me for many years since young. But I only knew about unconditional love a few years back. Though I thought proudly that I'll be able to practise it, I came to understand quite a bit lately that it takes more effort to get the hang of it.

I was a little, who am I kidding, very emotional when I thought a particular close friend of mine didn't care about me. In my mind, I assumed that that person did not like me and did not want to spend time with me. I was on tears when I was expressing this to my boyfriend. I guess I was very emo at that time.

But he made me laugh by saying, "Does that mean if your friend doesn't want to spend time with you, you are going to cry?" I laughed at his question. It made me look very childish.

What he said next stunned me. "That means you don't have unconditional love for your friend."

He added, "What if your friend tells you that she is no longer interested in you and would like to end the relationship? What would you do?"

At that moment, my mind was quick to answer, 'That could never happen, I'm sure.'

But later I realised, that's a wrong way to think.

If we really love someone unconditionally, whatever choices that makes that person happy, though it is choosing someone else instead of you, should make you feel happy too.

Hours later, I text my mentor, "How can we have unconditional love if emotions exist?"

And I got a reply that got me to understand, as long as we have emotions that keeps going from one corner to the other, we can never have unconditional love.

The key to unconditional love is to be understanding and be happy for that person without attaching any emotions.

Might sound ridiculous, but the idea of reacting to love and responding to unconditional love gets you discovering lots of things about yourself. 

And aren't that the greatest discovery of all?

Opportunity is Always Knocking The Door - Part 2

It turned out to be an awesome day!

And yes, we did get approved to visit the online radio station. It was a little unexpected but I was overjoyed the moment I stepped foot into the station. 

We were greeted well by the DJ's of DurianASEAN. They did ask us the reason for our visit. I contemplated whether I should answer that question or not. But decided to be truthful and told them that ET Ideas is planning to start its own online radio station and wanted to gain some exposure through this visit to DurianASEAN.

We were first brought into their soundproof studio where they broadcast all their shows. They were really patient with us as they explained all the equipments involved throughout the process of producing a good online radio show. From the mixer, the mic, the soundproof room, laptops, softwares to other gadgets involved combined with their skills, it was indeed an experiential learning for us.

We even got the chance to do some recording using their devices, where we introduced ET Ideas and ended with "This is DurianASEAN - The Voice Of Discovery". That was the coolest thing ever because it gave me a glimpse of being spontaneous during talk shows.

Excited with this new experience, we moved on to another studio that is in the Malay medium. We got introduced to the graphic designer and photographer/videographer. They are the men behind the videos that DurianASEAN produces on any particular issue.

We then sat down with the DJ's as Q&A session took place. 

We asked so many questions about their experience as an online radio DJ that even their guest speaker for their talk show arrived. The visit ended with a photograph of us with the DJ's and we said our 'thank you's before leaving the place. 

The best part is our aim was still achieved as the DJ's themselves gave us ideas on how we can come out with our own online radio, instead of taking us as a competitor like most people do.

With that said, isn't opportunity always there? It's whether we are ready to grab it or not.

Opportunity Is Always Knocking The Door - Part 1

I had a chat with a friend of mine who said, “People think we don’t get opportunities but actually the opportunities are always out there”.

If it was a few years ago, I would have totally disagreed with that statement, saying, “People are just lucky to get good opportunities in their life”.

But with things changed over the years, meeting new people with different perspective of life and taking certain actions towards building my own career, has changed the way I think as well.

So here was I trying to figure out as an intern how I can research the task given to me about online radio when my colleague tells me, “Hey, you know what? I know someone who has an online radio station. Maybe you can drop them a visit and get to know things better”.

I was pretty excited when I heard this. ‘This could be an awesome opportunity for my research! And I’ve never been to a radio station before. This is going to be great!', I thought to myself.

Though it took me sometime to call up the founder of the online radio station (due to not feeling well), I managed to explain to him about my intern company and the reason for our visit. He seemed a bit confused with my explanation. I guess not many people calls up a company asking if they can pay them a visit to explore their field of work. Maybe that or me and my intern company are just crazy.

At the end of our conversation, the founder of the online radio station requested an email stating the purpose of our visit before he can consider our proposal. I told him I will send the email and we ended our call.

However, after that conversation, I felt that my visit to the online radio station would be harder than expected. In my mind, I thought if people were to request a lot of things before approving something, it means they do not trust us and the proposal is going to be rejected.

I spoke to my boss about this, who also happens to be my mentor, and he told me to proceed with the email under the company, ET Ideas.

So, I drafted the email and asked my colleague’s favor to look through it in case of any mistakes. (Thanks to her, the email sounded much better. :) )

And so, I sent the email to the Founder of DurianASEAN.

Was the email approved? Did we visit DurianASEAN? That’s something you are about to find out on Part 2!